(no subject)

[oselle]

Because all bad things come from baylorsr, she sent me an entire gallery of screencaps from Jensen Ackles's movie, Devour. And then called me up to walk me through the caps, lest I miss anything. Well, I had a bunch of stuff to order from Amazon and they had it for only ten bucks so...you get the picture. AND SO DID I HAHAHAHA!

I'd somehow gotten the impression that this was a sort of teen slasher pic but it's actually about the occult. It's much too convoluted to go into here and I know I put a spoiler warning on but I don't want to give away the big spoiler at the end except to say that Jensen's character, Jake Gray, is either psychotic or something much, much worse.

The really important things you need to know are as follows:

1) We get a couple of glimpses of what must be Jensen Ackles's real-life high school yearbook picture and I'll tell you something -- he's better looking now. He was so flat-out pretty at that age that he was almost bland. I know that seems hard to believe but he's much more striking with a little wear-and-tear on his face. Oh, if only that were true for all of us!

2) Mucho angst and Jake cries twice. Beautifully. Who frigging looks this good with mucous running out of his nose?

3) One very brief and dirty sex scene involving no nudity but lots of panting. He also gets a tattoo and is forced to drink blood. It's fun.

4) My favorite line was when Jake's portly, nerdy friend Conrad calls him up to tell him that he has two girls in his room. "Invite me over," Jake quips. Conrad answers, "Hell, one look at you and they'd kick me out of bed." When you've got a string of movies like Superbad about ugly guys somehow getting the girl, it's nice to hear a little honesty.

5) Jensen Ackles can do a powerfully convincing dead-eye stare. Considering the writers strike looks to be dragging on and on and on, we may never get to see Dean die or anything like it, so I enjoyed this immensely.

Ratings on a scale of 1-10:
Pretty Rating: OMG, 12 at least. He's all green eyes and freckles and rosy pout. Great day in the mornin'!
Proto-Dean Rating: Hmmmm...6? He looks very much like Dean but Jake Gray is really sweet and not at all a smartass, so he doesn't have that devil-may-care charm. But I can see Jake as a much younger and less cynical version of Dean.
Recommended: Yes, but I'm a sucker.

Comments

[i-o-r-h-a-e-l.livejournal.com]

less cynical version of Dean

Hmm. Always wants to know when Dean turns to be such a smartass guy and what makes him that way.

Devour on one of our channels tomorrow, yay! (Though I've the VCD already. :P)

[ghyste.livejournal.com]

You know you're on the slippery slope when you start buying the back catalogue... says the woman who has owned Devour for some time already. Mind you, at least it'll offer me a measure of revenge against violet_wizard who owns all of Viggo Mortensen's countless movies - boy does that guy make some odd career choices!

[arabia764.livejournal.com]

I know exactly what you mean about him looking better now. Don't get me wrong, I think he looks fabbie in Devour (I actually DIDN'T buy it, I downloaded it. That's good going for me) but with a bit of experience to temper the prettiness... perfect.

A rubbish movie though. I wish someone would give the guy a chance on some decent material. I think he's a hell of an actor, let us see him do it!

[mews1945.livejournal.com]

Hmm. Well, I'll be looking for that on cable. I really can't afford to buy it right now. Christmas has strapped me. If I had to buy a tire, I'd be up the creek. But I like the idea of seeing him play someone different.

[baylorsr.livejournal.com]

Ahahaha, my own awesomeness never fails to amaze me. You are so ruined for, like, EVERYTHING.

[oselle.livejournal.com]

I hate that you are like this totally wholesome-looking Midwesterner corrupting a New Yorker. Isn't this supposed to be the OTHER way around? You SUCK buckets.

[oselle.livejournal.com]

Mmmm, it's worth it. Doubt you'll see it on cable anytime soon, it's a coupla years old I think.

[oselle.livejournal.com]

Delicous icon. GLASSES! Where's that one where Dean's biting his lip? I so love that one too. You have great icons.

[oselle.livejournal.com]

I've been on the slope since I started buying Smallville and Dark Angel. I'm freaking DOOMED. What next, will I be stocking up on Days of Our Lives??

[oselle.livejournal.com]

I think Dean was probably a smartass from age four. Poor thing.

[arabia764.livejournal.com]

You mean this one? Icons are easy when there are so many great pictures of Dean/Jensen around.

[oselle.livejournal.com]

WHAT episode is that from? I MUST KNOW!!!

[arabia764.livejournal.com]

I don't know!

But I do have a bigger version if you want it. Maybe you could work it out from that.

[oselle.livejournal.com]

We wants it, precious! I WILL FIGURE IT OUT even if I HAVE to watch ALL 44 EPISODES of S1 and S2...

[arabia764.livejournal.com]

Give me your email addy and I'll send it over. I have no idea where I got it from.