Maybe it's me

[oselle]

I think a problem I have at work is that I come across as being kind of cool and pally with people so that when I ask them to do something that's part of their job they think it's okay to say "no" to my face with a nice big dose of attitude to go with it.

This was my day today: I wrote a 32-page Powerpoint proposal for a client and filled out a complicated 9-page RFP for the same client, then reviewed it with the sales rep and submitted it to the client AND printed and bound hard copies of it to mail. This while working on two other proposals and writing, producing, editing, proofreading and getting approval for no less than 15 separate advertorials that all have to be completed by Thursday.

At 4:00 I asked our department coordinator to mail a media kit to the client whose proposal I'd been working on, with no help, for half the day. Here's our phone conversation:

ME: Can you mail a media kit to...

HER: Listen I'm really busy right now.

ME: I'll give you the address.

HER: Okay FINE.

(Hangs up phone. Seconds later, via IM...)

HER: I'll give you the media kit.

ME: (silently fuming) OK.

HER: Get Rob to mail it.

(Rob was already gone for the day.)

ME: OK.

At which point she STOMPED into my office, SLAMMED the media kit down on my desk and STOMPED out yelling, "YOU'RE WELCOME!!!" over her shoulder.

Moments later she was blithely yakking it up in the hallway with one of the editors, then later with the production director. She left for the day at 5:30 despite having come in at 10:30. I was at work until 7:00.

She's going to have a polite but really firm email from me waiting for her tomorrow morning. People SLAMMING shit on my desk and then snottily HOLLERING at me because I ask them to perform one of their MOST MINOR job functions is one of my biggest professional pet peeves. And you know what? If you're going to pull that shit because you're SO BUSY then at least have the common sense not to spend the rest of your come-in-late-leave-early day chit-chatting like you had all the time in the world. I don't think that's too much to ask but maybe that's JUST ME.

Comments

[roque-clasique.livejournal.com]

Um... god, I don't want to be the one to say this, but... *feels so awkward*...

it is. It's just you.

You must have missed the "It's okay to be a lazy jackass" memo. You really need to be more on top of things.

[oselle.livejournal.com]

Oh no, I didn't miss it...I wasn't on distribution for that memo. Almost EVERYBODY ELSE was, apparently.

[ariadnes-string.livejournal.com]

I am so there with you! I spent much of last week fuming about about a similar kind of thing--in which the head administrator in my office--not my assistant, but the woman in charge of budgets, etc--seemed to spend the whole week trying to tell me how to do my job (which is NOT her job) and trying to bully me into doing things her way.

She seemed blithely unperturbed by the idea of bugging me--even though, technically, I am her superior, and her job is a lot less secure than mine. It all just felt completely disrespectful.

Anyway--I'm ranting--but I just wanted to say that it most bugs me to see/experience women acting this way towards other women; gender trumps hierarchy, in my office at least, and staff never, ever, behaves this way with men....Indeed, I finally had to resort to siccing a man on her to get her to back off...

[oselle.livejournal.com]

it most bugs me to see/experience women acting this way towards other women

Yes, and it also reinforces the idea that we're always on the rag and have no control over our emotions. That's why when someone confronts me in this way I immediately go into a sort of lockdown mode where I'm ultra polite but don't mince words.

[tskterata.livejournal.com]

I really don't understand that kind of behavior (and thankfully don't see it very often). I mean, even if you were asking her to do something that either wasn't her job or that she didn't have time for (which it wasn't and you weren't) that's no excuse to be bitchy and rude. As far as I'm concerned, barring extraordinary circumstances, that kind of behavior is NEVER OK in a place of work.

But maybe that's JUST ME.

[oselle.livejournal.com]

I really think part of the problem is that we've been too chummy. Now, chummy or not, I'd never talk to anyone like that in the workplace, but some people don't know how to make that distinction and think that if you've gone out for a few drinks with a person you can basically mouth off to them the way you do with your siblings or something. Um...no.

[pearlette.livejournal.com]

Stick it to the rude cow.

I'll be right behind you.

[oselle.livejournal.com]

She sent me a snotty response this morning and I wrote back and really let her have it. I honestly expected her to be kind of contrite this morning but wow, she wasn't.

[i-o-r-h-a-e-l.livejournal.com]

Ewww. *pets you*

I'm glad at least no one will do something like that here, what with being Asians and all. But I'm probably generalizing, huh? *sighs*

:)

[oselle.livejournal.com]

Lucky you!

[claudia603.livejournal.com]

Ugh, how frustrating and disrespectful. :(

[oselle.livejournal.com]

And just stupid. If you're going to throw a tantrum, save it for something good.

[westmoon.livejournal.com]

Wow.

Between being rude and refusing to perform a basic function, why does this woman even still have a job?

I've been seeing a lot of that lately in my workplace - not the rudeness but the firm, smiling refusal to perform certain tasks - and every time I'm amazed.

[oselle.livejournal.com]

I work for a very strange company where once a person's been there for a long enough time, they're probably never going to be gotten rid of. That said, this is the second time within two weeks she's had a freakout like this (the last time was with someone else) and if it keeps up someone will have to say something to her. Even in that bedlam, screaming and throwing things can't go unnoticed forever.

[mara-snh.livejournal.com]

Oh man: immature fangirl empowerment crap in the workplace. Jeez. Don't people realize jobs are a privilege and behavior like that can cause you to lose them?

She's probably chatting up editors and production directors to step right over you and into their little section of the flow chart. May she trip and fall flat on her face.

[oselle.livejournal.com]

I'll say this much for the place -- there are no flow charts. Those people she was talking to are just as powerless as any of us there, she was just shooting the shit to pass her apparently ample time.

[mara-snh.livejournal.com]

Oh no. That makes it even worse, somehow. Well, I hope someone in command realizes soon that she's only draining the organization's energy in exchange for her pay check. In my day, you could get fired in nothing flat for having "an attitude problem." This chick sounds like an attitude problem would be a major improvement over the status quo. Good luck!

[sistermagpie.livejournal.com]

I swear every office has a small group of people wearing the I ACTUALLY CONSIDER IT MY RESPONSIBILITY TO GET THE WORK DONE and then there's the people whose job it is to get out of any and all work. I wonder if they bring it up in their interview.

[oselle.livejournal.com]

There are about half a dozen people in my office who do all the work and every other single person there just wanders around TALKING LOUDLY ABOUT ALL THE WORK THEY DO and OMG I'M SO BUSY. Maybe they wouldn't be so pressed for time if they weren't working a six-hour day that mostly consisted of a) ordering and eating breakfast b) talking about reality television c) ordering and eating lunch d) going down for smokes e) whining about how busy they are.

[kjfri.livejournal.com]

People's suckage levels never fail to amaze me. I have one of those in my tiny office and I have chosen to keep her far out of my circle of trust. And it's worked, my days of ignoring her and her suckage have made working with her/near her relatively pain-free.

[oselle.livejournal.com]

She sent me such a snotty response this morning that she's totally dead to me.