Guess you had to be there.

[oselle]

So I dreamt that there was this big noreaster storm in New York and somehow Jensen Ackles gets marooned in my apartment. Only it's not the apartment I live in now, it's my parents' awful three-room tenement. In a small mercy served up by my subconscious, my parents no longer live there but my sister is living with me. We're all sitting in the living room. I'm in the recliner in front of the TV, my sister's in the chair next to me and Jensen is waaaaaaaaay over in the corner on the hideous couch. All smacked up on the edge of the hideous couch like he's trying to disappear into it and he's sitting there texting. He's wearing a white t-shirt and jeans and looks...OMG phenomenal, but he's sitting there texting and won't look up. Texting like his life depends on it.

My sister's staring at the TV, she couldn't care less that we've got Jensen Ackles in our living room. We don't even have cable, so there's not even anything good to watch. I'm absolutely horrified by the awkwardness of this situation. Bad storm, marooned Jensen, awful apartment, NO CABLE. Dear God, we're sitting there watching network. I ask Jensen if he's hungry and he just grunts at me without looking up from his Blackberry and I realize I dodged a bullet because there's no way in hell I could fathom cooking for Jensen Ackles, especially since I know there's fuck-all in the kitchen. What am I gonna do, pour the man a goddamn bowl of cornflakes?

I'm sitting there just DYING. Rain lashes the window. Some crap mutters senselessly on the tube. Over it all, Jensen texting: tick tickticktick tick ticktickticktickticktick tick tick tick.

Say something, asshole! I think frantically. Say ANYTHING! So I lean over and blurt out...and I mean I BLURT out:

"ARE YOU TEXTING JARED?!?"

And he stops texting and glances up with this...withering expression, enough to blight every darling bud of May, and he says, "Why would I be texting Jared?" and then he just shakes his head and goes back to texting.

I shrivel back into my chair totally withered by Jensen's withering look and utter scorn for myself and my idiotic question and the hallowed fantasy of J2 and fortunately I woke up before I could die of irreversible mortification.

This was a horrible dream but somehow upon waking up I found it funny and I sort of laughed about it all day but now I'm typing it out I gotta say...not all that funny.

Comments

[janissa11.livejournal.com]

"It's a little funny." *grin* I dunno, I guess any dream that includes the Beauty That Is Jensen is pretty decent, but yeah. Withering ain't good.

I dreamed a couple of nights ago that I was desperately trying to text Chris Hayes that we had Jesus reborn and currently a patient (adult) in our children's ER. I do not know where that came from, but Dream Me was POSITIVE, and also convinced it was the biggest news story since ever. And I was fumbling so hard and (eta, since I evidently am a premature ejaculator HAHAHAAAAAAAAH) couldn't even figure out how to tweet the damn thing.

[oselle.livejournal.com]

Honestly, I enjoy any nocturnal guest appearances by Jensen, withering or not. And LORD was he ever pretty, even in the Apartment Where Hope Went to Die.

Who is Chris Hayes? Why do I feel like I should know who that is?

[janissa11.livejournal.com]

He's the Washington editor for The Nation, frequent flier on Maddow. I follow him on Twitter, for the hell of it.

[ariadnes-string.livejournal.com]

oh gosh, I'm sorry about the withering, but, at least in your retelling, it was kinda a little bit funny...sorry...

Oh Jensen, why so hung up on cable?

(also, I've always thought that rl JA was, not a bad guy, but perhaps had a tendency towards the withering and disdainful, so maybe your subconscious was onto something...)

[oselle.livejournal.com]

but perhaps had a tendency towards the withering and disdainful

Yes, I have at times leaned in this direction myself. Although up until now, he's always been a sweetie in my dreams. ALAS even in my subconscious I can't catch a break.

[tskterata.livejournal.com]

Well you're telling of the withering dream made me laugh (and I'm sick as a dog right now so the laugh did me worlds of good).

I don't think I've ever dreamed of Jensen, although I did dream that I was invited on Jared and Gen's wedding cruise (and I don't even like Jared). In the dream Jared had a polish accent and Karl Malden's nose for some reason, and Gen was lovely and charming (go figure). Also, I spent the whole cruise trying to borrow a cell phone from the most annoying prick ever, just so I could call my husband to tell him where I was.

It was a totally stupid dream.

[oselle.livejournal.com]

Well, Jared IS Polish so the Polish thing makes sense. Karl Malden is, however, Croatian. I think.

[amber1960.livejournal.com]

Oh dear. Actually that is probably the sort of dream I would have about meeting Jensen too - which reflects my deep seated feelings of inadequacy in the presence of unfeasbibly beautiful people but also the fact that I think he comes across in real life as a bit unapproachable... I get the impression that he is quite shy (I think he used the word reserved in an interview once) and shy people can give off some quite withering vibes sometimes!!
Still as I am highly unlikely to ever meet him in real life, there's nothing to worry about, is there... :D

[oselle.livejournal.com]

Withering!Jensen represents a new persona in my dream-life, since in my previous dreams of Jensen (all G-rated, alas) he was always an absolute doll.

My dreams of Dean however, are almost never G-rated. Interesting, that.

[amber1960.livejournal.com]

How interesting - somewhere deep in your subconscious, you know the difference between real life and Dean. Or maybe it is just that Dean is that much hotter than Jensen....??? Hee!

[oselle.livejournal.com]

With all due respect to the very lovely Mr. Ackles, I don't need my subconscious to tell me that Dean is hotter than Jensen!

[ghyste.livejournal.com]

I’ve never dreamt of Jensen, but I did once have a dream where I was a member of a UN taskforce that was sent to rescue Dean Winchester from a South American jail. Alas Dean was not grateful enough to have sex with me, which was a bit of a blow to my ego. Maybe I should have brought pie?

[oselle.livejournal.com]

Hmm, sounds to me like this dream may have been inspired by Jason Teague's Chinese-prison captivity in Smallville. RIVETING TELEVISION I tell you.

[ghyste.livejournal.com]

I hadn't watched that at the time of the dream, but I may have seen you drooling over analysing it :D

[oselle.livejournal.com]

Yes, I think that was some of the most insightful analysis I've ever composed. I was especially proud of perceptive critique like GOOD GOD! and OH GOD! and NOW THAT'S WHAT I'M TALKING ABOUT!!

[dodger-sister.livejournal.com]

Trust me, this is both hilarious and not a bad dream at all. Because the only time I have dreamed of Jensen - he was on the Starship Enterprise and Kirk was bffs with Chad Michael Murray. They decided they needed hookers. Spock was all eyebrow-y at them and they ran off to "totally impregnant a twink" (yeah, Chad) and I saw the back of the kid and before he turned around I knew it was Dawson's Creek era Jensen and I was like "No, no, omg, Star Trek/CW RPS/space!hooker/MPreg - wakeupwakeupwakeup"

Clearly if you had just stayed asleep longer you would have gotten to the part where your sister fell asleep and you found steak in the fridge and fed him and then had the sexytime and then he admitted that he was texting Jared, asking for advice on how to hit on you.

See? But there was nowhere good my Star Trek/CW RPS/space!hooker/MPreg dream was going. Nowhere good at all.

Has my sister informed you of her new Sims 3 expansion pack and the trip to China to get the mystical stones? So. Not. Kidding. If she hasn't, ask her.

[oselle.livejournal.com]

The problem with your dream was that it was Dawson's Creek Jensen. He just didn't look like himself in that show at all. Nevertheless, Michelle Williams sleeping with him while wearing neck-to-ankle flannel pajamas was one of the funniest things I've ever seen on television.

If I had stayed asleep longer I would have found out for certain that Jensen was texting his wife, which was a knowledge I actually had in the dream, in the way that you "just know" things in dreams. And texting her about how he was stuck in this awful apartment and promising her that he would be on the first plane he could get out of there. A bit of misery I chose to omit from my original post.

I have not heard of the new Sims expedition, but I can assure you that Lana long ago took care of those mystical stones.

[dodger-sister.livejournal.com]

I hate when you know things in dreams that you wish you didn't know. Just go with my idea for how it ended. It's better.

I have not heard of the new Sims expedition

Sounds like you and your wife have things to discuss (I know you spent that whole last phone call discussing Detroit for some bizarre reason that I've yet to figure out) but Sims is srz bznz here, woman! China! They went to China! Also, I highly approve of the Glitter Sparkle Castiel you sent her. Good work.

[cpsings4him.livejournal.com]

All my celebrity dreams tend to have a similar theme as this one (embarrassment!). However, I DID manage to have one dream a few months ago in which I was at some sort of swanky party (lol - around here?? We don't DO swank. :p) at which Colin Firth was in attendance. In the dream, Colin and I seemed to be the best of friends (though, even in my subconscious state I was wondering at how this had come about) and he stuck by me all evening while we held elegant looking drinks and I basically fawned over him, touching his sleeve at every opportunity. I quite enjoyed it. :p